Worthiness, purpose and rare jewels
You’re pretty amazing, you know that? You came into this world not even able to support your own head, yet you could command every adult in the room. You were fearless, relentless and curious. Once you had the head thing figured out, you learnt how to crawl. Fast. Then you moved onto show the entire world your perseverance and ability to fall flat on your ass and get back up again, time and time again as you learnt to walk. You were a force to be reckoned with; a perfect, shining light to be worshipped and adored. And you still are.
Before you prepare any ‘buts’ or caveats to negotiate down your worthiness, know it doesn’t depreciate. I need to remember this too; we don’t get any less worthy throughout our life. There’s nothing we can do, say, be or become that makes us anything less that a little ball of perfect God/dess Dust. If the ‘perfect’ word is too loaded for you, think ‘deliberate’. The Universe wants you here, now. As is. Totally you. Yes, even with the bits that you don’t like so much. They’re all you, and You are on purpose. We speak of ‘finding our purpose’; perhaps it’s not to find something outside of ourselves, or to decide why we’re here, but rather why would we like to be here? What makes us come alive? What could we make, do or become with all that we’ve been given, if we knew in our bones that all of ‘who we are’ was intentional? The precious jewels within us, the bedrock that grows them, the friction and pressure that forces them to shine. Find a purpose for all of your aspects, they’re all meant to be there.
We sometimes want to be flawless like the clearest diamond, yet do we really want our highest aim to be totally see-through? If we regard for a moment the ruby, which is even more valuable than a diamond at times, the term ‘imperfection’ isn’t even used. Rather, imperfections are ‘inclusions’ which add to its value and prove that the ruby is real and not synthetic. It’s the same with sapphires and emeralds. What can your inclusions teach you? What can they bring to the Once in a Universe event that is you? They may not always bring things you like or are particularly proud of, but what can you make or who can you become with them as an accepted part of who you are?
“Your personal power grows each time you honour and accept yourself, even just a little. You’re infinite. You never know who you’ll inspire by you simply being you.”Earthtide Tarot
Awareness of our shortcomings can be painful and make us want to run from facing them, as no one likes to feel bad or unworthy. In truth, when we turn away it just makes those parts of you feel even more unworthy as you’re rejecting yourself before others can do it for you. Believe me, I don’t want to be writing these words right now as then I have to listen to them myself and I reeeally don’t want to. But I want you all to see how amazing and beautiful you all are and to do that, I have to see that in myself too. It feels like forgiveness; when another holds you and through their words or actions; tell you that they love you, that you’re ok and that you’re worthy. Even though it’s difficult, you surrender to the other, you allow the other to hold you until the unworthiness wave crashes and you allow the love, worthiness, acceptance and forgiveness to flow into you. When it’s you forgiving yourself, you feel both sides. You can feel the wave of reluctance, the desire to hide, the shame and the unworthiness crash over you even as you extend yourself the love, worthiness and acceptance you’ve always craved. It seems impossible to occupy both sides, so your psyche has to choose: hold onto the thought-form that separated you away, or let go of it and allow yourself to return to your natural, connected and wholly beloved state that is You, right here and now. We’re not broken, or made wrong. We are deliberate. We are beautiful.
“Your purpose doesn’t have to pay the rent, your calling doesn’t have to change the world and it doesn’t even have to be a thing that other people know about. Or it could be all of those things.
We have many purposes and places where our soul shines through, just look for the glimmers and be prepared to dig.”Earthtide Tarot
So, as the New Year and New Decade approaches, let’s look to all that we can become. We’ve been half-assing New Year’s Resolutions for 4000 years (story here) so why not try a different way? Can you imagine what you’d do if you didn’t believe you couldn’t? Rather than focusing on the aspects of self that you’ll restrict or cut out, what aspects of yourself would you like to set free and develop? What if that amazing thing you really want to happen, happens? What if you already have everything it takes for you to realize your fullest potential? How will you thrive? What if who and where you are right now was ok or even perfect for what you want to do, become or achieve? Really imagine it, give yourself permission to feel the possibilities! You’re the rarest precious jewel there is, there’s only one of you so don’t hold back your magnificence. ✨
Though it’s been quoted a gazillion times, Marianne Williamson said it the best:
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do.”Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of “A Course in Miracles”
Have a happy and safe Christmas, a bright Solstice and a relaxing Yule. May this new year and decade bring you fun, fulfillment, connection and belly laughs!
With much love,